Just as I was posting that other blog, bitching about how I’ve used up all the good men, I remembered the HUGE crush I have on someone.
There’s a girl that works at the coffee shop down the street from my house. She has the most mesmerizing arms I have ever seen. Anyone who knows me well, knows that I have a bit of a vein fetish. She has tanned skin running across the most beautiful arm veins. More pronounced than most women’s. Like she works with her hands a lot.
I want to press my tongue to one of those veins and feel it’s warmth dip beneath my pressure.
She’s the prefect combination of man and woman. Short tousled hair, a strong chin, deep brown eyes fringed in jealousy inspiring lashes. Jeans slung low on slender hips and a slight hunch in her back. She is gorgeous.
I know her name and what she’s going to school for but only because I overheard her telling someone else. Whenever I order coffee from her I become so tongue tied that sometimes I just point to what I want. She might think I’m very slow…or possibly mute.
The trouble with me and women has always been that I never know what to say to them. Throw a man in front of me and I can keep him entertained for hours. But a girl…a girl who obviously does not play both sides of the field…what would she want with me? A girl who unabashedly loves cock. But who also melts at the sight of the swell of a B cup breast.
Now that I’m almost 30 I feel like I’ve missed the boat on having a real girlfriend. I don’t think a girl like her would be with someone who wasn’t a complete lesbian. And she’s the only girl I have any interest in feverishly making out with while a movie tries and fails to catch our attention.
Anyone want to give me some advice? I’m sure she’s got a girlfriend but on the off chance that she doesn’t…how might I get one step closer to those ridiculously hot arm veins?
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